Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
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Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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