Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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