i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize