i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
