You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
