:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
is it fun? or sober?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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