We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
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