Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.

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(510): View more from California

I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed

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(713): View more from Texas

this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy

(1-713): View more from Texas

well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(205): View more from Alabama

Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back

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(630): View more from Illinois

i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.

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(443): View more from Maryland

There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.

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(206): View more from Washington

It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.

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