My room smells like vodka and shame
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I could make wine with my vomit
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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