his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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