The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
