how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
