the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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