I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
