so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize