why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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