if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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