do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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