Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize