So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize