We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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