I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
