Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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