Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
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