just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
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both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
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I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"