At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Randomize
