Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
