Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
