I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
