We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
