just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i just had sex bonerless
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
