hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
