I just cut my nipple shaving
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
