I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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