Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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