oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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