I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
