you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
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He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
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I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.