About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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