so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
