No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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