we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
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