Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
