Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry somecallmekay hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(805): View more from California

An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.

Fav 19 4890 1221
share tweet
(847): View more from Illinois

stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever

Fav 47 7199 1291
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(217): View more from Illinois

what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"

Fav 9 951 1381
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(646): View more from New York

Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.

Fav 0 397 338
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(917): View more from New York City

Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.

Fav 0 51 5
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT