i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
