I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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