So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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