you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
