i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I look better un-naked...
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
