Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
its not stalking. its research.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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