she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize